Programming the Mind
by phil on Sunday Jun 1, 2003 12:37 PM
emotional intelligence, self-programming
I think, well, I there are these imperatives or directives I used to put in my head. Those used to bother me. You know, like "be right," "do straight," "be satisfied," I'd be so scared if I didn't have any of those, I'd feel like my life was always just hanging up in the air. I dunno man.
I was killing myself today too, thinking. Sometimes, I just sort of, inhibit my thought, have a thought that interrupts a thought, when I have thought I can't get away from, and I'm just trapt in my own thinking, I get really frustrated.
Well, I think you shouldn't put foreign objects in your head, I think like those recurring statements, like "be satisfied," or "don't worry" or whatever, they help for a little while, but then your body just rejects that kind of stuff.
The write-your-emotions-on-your-face/body drive hasn't been rejected it's something your body is yearning and wanting to do anyways. Same with the "bear-pain" directive, that too is something your body just wants to do, to be tough, to just feel something and be strong.
Lessons don't go away too, you learn some lesson, you can tap that for decision making.
Knobs of control.
In regards to emotional intelligence, having this hovering wrath of self-awareness, I think that's great, but it shouldn't come in labelling emotions. It's annoying walking around running thoughts in my mind like, "okay, I'm agitated, okay I'm being defeatest, okay I'm over-reacting." But, I think like, you know, our body wants to be un-numb, so if you can amplify that "in-touch" signal, that should be good, help get awareness. I don't think taking a critical view of yourself around with you is healthy. Life is an art thingy, sometimes you self-criticize, sometimes you don't. Sometimes you're in complete control of your reactions, sometimes your not.
This book "Emotional Intelligence" that I picked up was really good and interesting. Like most books I read, after a few months, I only keep 1-3 key concepts. From this book, it just drove the point home that the ratio of internal weight on our states of emotional powers to intellectual powers is like 24 to 1. I lean more on the rationalist thinking side, and always ignore how I feel. The other major point is the idea that knowing yourself is the key foundation to emotional intelligence. Having an objective awareness of your general sentiments and then manipulating yourself and your environment to effectively manage your feelings is the key to emotional intelligence.
But, I'd still like to find a book of some sort, maybe "Programming the mind." For people like me who like to dig into the source code, change things up a bit, control their life properly. I used to tell people that what I've really been trying to do all this time is to "manually boot" myself, re-learn things, like thinking, feeling, emotion on terms that were outside of the influence of childhood molding by others.