The most frequently cited books on Human Relations from 5+ years of Ask.MetaFilter Q&A.

I counted every amazon link on every single question and answer page (5,427 pages) from the human relations category of Ask.MetaFilter. This spans more than five years worth of advice.

Personally, I trust this list to be the best books on the topic. That's because I believe in the power of hive minds, and I believe that MetaFilter is one of the best hive minds out there. I don't know why MetaFilter is so good. Perhaps it's because it costs $5 to join the community, or that it has a slight bias for librarians. All I know is that some book recommendations on there have changed my life.

And now I have a lot more reading to do.

- Philip Dhingra
Note: One vote per book per user. Spans 2003-12-09 thru 2009-03-19.
Be sure to check out my self-help blog: Self-Programming.
I also made a list for the Work & Money category.

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Revised and Updated
by David D. Burns
The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
by Gary Chapman
The Gift of Fear
by Gavin De Becker
How to Win Friends & Influence People
by Dale Carnegie
The Feeling Good Handbook
by David D. Burns
Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss what Matters Most
by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen, Roger Fisher
You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation
by Deborah Tannen
Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life
by Martin E. P. Seligman
He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys
by Greg Behrendt, Liz Tuccillo
Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships
by David Schnarch PhD
The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World
by Marti Olsen Laney
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
by Melody Beattie
The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook, Fourth Edition
by Edmund J. Bourne
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
by Dossie Easton, Catherine A. Liszt
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
by Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert
by John M. Gottman, Nan Silver
Don't Shoot the Dog!: The New Art of Teaching and Training
by Karen Pryor
Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition
by Harville Hendrix
How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
by Leil Lowndes
Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder
by Paul T. Mason, Randi Kreger
The Artist's Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity [10th Anniversary Edition]
by Julia Cameron
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
by Harriet Lerner
When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times
by Pema Chodron
Intimate Connections
by David D. Burns
Taking Charge of Your Fertility, 10th Anniversary Edition: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health
by Toni Weschler
Emotional Intelligence: 10th Anniversary Edition; Why It Can Matter More Than IQ
by Daniel Goleman
Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity
by David Allen
How to Be an Adult: A Handbook for Psychological and Spiritual Integration
by David Richo
Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (Collins Business Essentials)
by Robert B. Cialdini
Man's Search for Meaning
by Viktor E. Frankl
Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel by Changing the Way You Think
by Dennis Greenberger, Christine Padesky
Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, Freshly Updated
by Judith Martin, Gloria Kamen
No More Mr. Nice Guy!
by Robert A. Glover
Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto
by Anneli Rufus
The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists
by Neil Strauss
The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment
by Eckhart Tolle
The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
by Steven Pressfield
Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
by Susan Forward, Craig Buck
Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
by Lundy Bancroft
Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last
by John Gottman
A Guide to Rational Living by Albert Ellis, Robert A. Harper, Melvin Powers
Asperger Syndrome and Long-Term Relationships by Ashley Stanford
Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking by Malcolm Gladwell
Divorce Busting: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again by Michele Weiner-Davis
Emily Post's Etiquette, 17th Edition (Thumb Indexed) by Peggy Post
Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher, William L. Ury, Bruce Patton
Guide to Getting It On, 5th Edition by Paul Joannides
He's Scared, She's Scared: Understanding the Hidden Fears That Sabotage Your Relationships by Steven Carter, Julia Sokol
How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie
If... (Questions For The Game of Life) by Evelyn McFarlane, James Saywell
Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts by Carol Tavris, Elliot Aronson
Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers by Lois P. Frankel
Please Understand Me: Character and Temperament Types by David Keirsey, Marilyn Bates
Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence by Rosalind Wiseman
Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls by Mary Pipher, Ruth Ross
Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live Too by Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene
The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene
The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock
The Dance of Intimacy by Harriet Lerner
The Dangerous Book for Boys by Conn Iggulden, Hal Iggulden
The Definitive Book of Body Language by Barbara Pease, Allan Pease
The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self, Revised Edition by Alice Miller
The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom, A Toltec Wisdom Book by Don Miguel Ruiz
The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play by Neil Fiore
The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships by John Gottman
The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven Techniques for Overcoming Your Fears by Martin M. Antony, Richard P. Swinson
Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship by Mira Kirshenbaum
Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror by Judith Herman
What To Do When Someone You Love Is Depressed : A Practical, Compassionate, and Helpful Guide by Mitch Golant Ph.D., Susan K. Golant
When I Say No, I Feel Guilty by Manuel J. Smith
Why People Believe Weird Things: Pseudoscience, Superstition, and Other Confusions of Our Time by Michael Shermer, Stephen Jay Gould
Woman: An Intimate Geography by Natalie Angier

© 2009 Philip Dhingra